Survival (2016) Survival Lesson

Survival Lesson: If you are chained up and being molested by a bad guy lady, steal a bobby pin from her hair with your mouth to spring your shackles after she leaves.

Synopsis: A bunch of people running around a vast wilderness magically all running into each other to stick shivs into each other or share really bad dialog.

Rating: 2/10. This movie really made no sense from the get-go. Like taking a tank and two armored vehicles to kidnap an unarmed farmgirl. The music was really awful. I almost shut it off for that alone. Poor acting. Nonsensical plot. The fighting seemed pretty good, but you'd never know since they used the seizure inducing camera shake technique. There really isn't much good to say about this one. The tank was cool even if it didn't make sense. The setting was nice.

By the way, Danny Glover does not have a main role, and is only displayed prominently in an attempt to get people to watch this. Also there are no cliffs on fire or helicopters. I don't think she ever has a hatchet either, but I'm not going to watch again to find out.